The Unbalanced Packet

by Stanford

(Jeremy Horwitz and Matthew Kaufman)

Tossups

Tossup: 1. What do Men Without Hats, Anne Murray, and Tragically Hip have in common, aside from having dropped off the face of the planet? Well, they share this characteristic with Joni Mitchell, The Guess Who, and Paul Anka. If that doesn’t help, perhaps mention of k. d. Lang, Snow, and Neil Young helps. FTP, where do Crash Test Dummies, Alanis Morissette, and Rush all hail from?

Answer: Canada (accept similar answers like "Canadian bands")

Tossup: 2. She's currently a senior at UCLA, having given up acting after the cancellation of her NBC series in 1994. She got her start in showbiz as an extra in Pumpkin Head and as a pal off Emmanuel Lewis in Webster. After that, she appeared as a spoiled rich girl in MacGyver, a cancer patient in Doogie Howser, M.D., Murphy's protege in Murphy Brown, and a young version of Bette Middler’s character in Beaches. FTP, name her, who for those of you who didn't go to junior high school with her is probably best known for playing the title character in a series also starring Joey Lawrence.

Answer: Mayim Bialik

Tossup: 3. He played keyboards on Jimi Hendrix’s Voodoo Child. He sang the original version of Feelin’ Alright. He sang the original version of Gimme Some Lovin’ with the Spencer Davis Group. He’s also been with Blind Faith and Traffic, but may be best known for his solo career. FTP, name this singer/keyboardist/guitarist who recorded the hits The Finer Things, Back in the High Life Again, Higher Love, and Roll with It.

Answer: Steve Winwood

Tossup: 4. This pitcher had an unusual propensity for really bad injuries. In 1988, during the middle of a pennant race, he severed 90% of the tip of his middle finger on his pitching hand while operating hedge clippers. Then, during Spring Training in 1993, he was the only survivor of a boating accident that killed Cleveland Indian teammates Tim Crews and Steve Olin. FTP, name this man, who probably enjoyed better days as a member of the vaunted starting rotation of the 1986 New York Mets.

Answer: Bobby Ojeda

Tossup: 5. An orgasm, a kamikaze, and a Long Island iced tea require it. Most margarita recipes and many zombie recipes call for it. This ingredient is most often 46 proof and its primary producer is Cointreau (pronounced "kun-TROH"). Lazy alcoholics often substitute Curaçao (pronounced "kur-uh-SAH-oh"), or Grand Marnier (pronounced "mahr-NYAY"). FTP, name this liqueur which can be substituted for with any orange liqueur.

Answer: Triple Sec (prompt on "vodka" ONLY if before "margarita.")

Tossup: 6. "Everywhere I go, something reminds me of her." "’Nice beaver’. ‘Thanks, I just got it stuffed.’" "That's why I went to Beirut, to get some peace." "Getting your nuts bit off by a laplander, that's the way I want to go." "When I see five weirdos in togas stabbing a man, I shoot the bastards!" "Please disperse. There is nothing to see here. Keep moving."
"It's Enrico Pallazzo!" (pronounced: pah-LAHT-zoh) All of these lines appear in, FTP, what movie starring George Kennedy, Ricardo Montalbahn, Priscilla Presley, O.J. Simpson and Leslie Nielsen?

Answer: The Naked Gun: from the Files of Police Squad! (prompt on "Leslie Nielsen" or "Lt. Frank Drebin")

Tossup: 7. This troublemaker’s adult nickname makes a little more sense when you learn that he was called "Scooter" as a kid. He loves milk and little kids and spends most of his time away from work helping out a youth center in LA. He’s a mechanical genius who can do just about anything with a propane torch and some spare parts. His favorite possession is definitely his black and red 1982 GMC custom G-series van. FTP, name this fictional character played by Lawrence Tureaud a.k.a. Mr. T.

Answer: Sergeant Bosco "Bad Attitude" Baracus

Tossup: 8. Anyone like me who's been to Vegas at least a dozen times had to instantly recognize the inaccuracies in the crash scene from this movie. First off, if you approach the Strip head on, you'll crash directly into the Stratosphere. Second, the Hard Rock Cafe isn't even on the Strip, so the airplane couldn't have crashed through its sign. And finally, the plane skidded into the Mirage because the Strip veered, but the change in the Strip's direction occurs a full mile away. Well, that's what you get when you let Nicholas Cage try to carry an action movie by himself. FTP, name this movie, which also included actors Colm Meaney, John Cusack, and John Malkovich.

Answer: Con Air

Tossup: 9. Fast-food restaurants had already been a way of life in America for years, but in 1951, Robert O. Peterson, the owner of a chain of successful local restaurants, developed this, the first drive-through restaurant. Located primarily in California, Texas, and Arizona, it featured a smiling clown who greeted motorists ordering through a two-way speaker device inside the clown’s head. FTP, name this home of newsworthy 1993 E. coli poisonings, whose latest commercials feature the Ultimate Cheesburger™ being hawked by Jack.

Answer: Jack in the Box

Tossup: 10. He played on the Toronto Blue Jays long enough to garner a Topps baseball card in 1982, but he never quit school, and left the game the next year to pursue another career — with the Boston Celtics. He played in the NBA for 14 seasons, including stints with the Sacrmento Kings, Portland Trailblazers and Phoenix Suns. FTP, name him, now head coach of the Suns.

Answer: Danny Ainge

Tossup: 11. Warning — two answers required! The last name’s the same. She got her first guitar because her runaway sister left and forgot her guitar. He guest starred as Uncle Phil on Mad about You. Her first band was the Graces, formed with ex-Go Go Charlotte Caffey. He directed the comedy classic High Anxiety. Her album Blurring the Edges has gone platinum and featured the most over-played song of the summer. FTP, name this unrelated pair who, if combined into one person, might be the 2000-Year Old Bitch.

Answer: Mel and Meredith Brooks

Tossup: 12. Two versions of this cartoon began airing in the U.S. in 1984. World Events Productions bought the cartoon shows Golion and Dairugger XV from Toei Animation, dubbed them, trimmed the violence, and linked unrelated characters between the two shows. Dairugger was a robot composed of many vehicles. Golion was more famous, being composed of five lions. FTP, name the show, whose Defenders of the Universe were frequently prone to utter "Form blazing sword!"

Answer: Voltron: Defender of the Universe

Tossup: 13. Kerouac’s On the Road wasn’t the only unfinished book to appear, in part, in the paperback quarterly New World Writing #7. Also included was this first work of a copywriter from a small New York ad agency. This prequel to Closing Time takes place in the closing months of World War II in an American bomber squadron off Italy. It’s the tale of the lives of General Peckham, Doc Deneeka, and Yossarian’s other cohorts. FTP, name this classic novel which includes Major Major Major Major, written by Joseph Heller.

Answer: Catch-22

Tossup: 14. So, you want to reach the ultimate prize? Well, in this movie, you won't be asked the capital of Assyria. Instead, you need to be penitent, you need to trust that an invisible ramp will magically support you, and, Lord, you better know that in Latin, Jehovah starts with an "I". FTP, name this movie that opened with River Phoenix playing a young version of Harrison Ford’s character.

Answer: Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade

Tossup: 15. First seen circa 1982, they were even sold by Mr. Robinson on Saturday Night Live’s Mr. Robinson’s Neighborhood. His models, however, didn’t include the trademark Xavier Robert’s butt tattoo and, in fact, were merely normal dolls with their heads torn off and replaced by lettuce. FTP, name this mid-‘80s doll sold by Coleco.

Answer: Cabbage Patch Kids

Tossup: 16. Warning–two answers required! They’re writers and producers and actors. One’s first acting credit was in the direct-to-video release Dorothy Meets Ozma of Oz. They’re slated to appear in David Zucker’s BASEketball. They’re somewhat known for Cannibal! The Musical, but are best-known for keeping Comedy Central afloat. FTP, name these creators of The Spirit of Christmas, and South Park.

Answer: Trey Parker and Matt Stone

Tossup: 17. He really, really, really wanted to win Wimbledon — so much so that he dropped out of the French Open in 1990 in order to better prepare; odd, given that he had won that Grand Slam three times. Alas, it was not to be, losing in the semifinals. He'd come closer; in 1986, he lost in the finals to Boris Becker, and in 1987, to underdog Pat Cash. FTP, name this hard-luck tennis champion from Czechoslovakia.

Answer: Ivan Lendl

Tossup: 18. The name’s the same. It’s Bailiff Bull Shannon’s real first name on Night Court. The better known bearer of this name started out as a physician in 16th century France. He began to make a career change once he published 1547’s Centuries, a work consisting of rhymed quatrains grouped in hundreds, each group called a century. His book caused such a stir that Catherine de Médicis invited him to cast the horoscopes of her children. FTP, name this physician of Charles IX of France whose prophecies are still believed by many today.

Answer: Nostradamus

Tossup: 19. He recently announced his candidacy for the Reform Party nomination for governor of Minnesota. He's not a political novice — he's the mayor of a small Minnesota city where he was first elected by defeating an 18-year-old incumbent. He's also allegedly an actor, having appeared with Arnold Schwarzenegger in the movies Predator and The

Running Man, and in an episode of The X-Files. FTP, name this man, who gained fame, first as a competitor and later as an announcer with Gorilla Monsoon and Mean Jean, in the World Wrestling Federation.

Answer: Jesse "The Body" Ventura

Tossup: 20. The Sarien Encounter, Vohaul’s Revenge, and The Pirates of Pestulon were the first three. Number seven was recently bagged, so don’t expect a follow up to The Time Ripper, The Next Mutation, and The Spinal Frontier. Created by The Two Guys from Andromeda for Sierra On-Line, this computer game series is one of the biggest sellers in the area of graphic adventure games. FTP, name this popular series starring space-faring janitor Roger Wilco.

Answer: Space Quest

Tossup: 21. In Boogie Nights, the stereo salesman in that ridiculous cowboy outfit uses this five-character name to describe a necessary modification piece for any 8-track machine. The name is more well known as the codename of a soldier whose malfunctioning comlink made it impossible for him to keep his position. FTP, give this common name, originally heard in the relative vicinity of Alderon, and which comes right before the question, "Why aren't you at your post?!"

Answer: TK421

Tossup: 22. Mmmm…spelling question. It’s "a big, dumb, balding, North American ape. With no chin," according to Bart. Marge happily chimes in to tell us that it also has "…a short temper." Thanks to how this strange word is spelled, Bart is able to accumulate twenty-two points, plus a triple-word-score, plus fifty points for using all his letters — distraction enough to allow him to ditch the family game of Scrabble®. Of course, we all remember the first-season Simpsons episode entitled "Bart the Genius" where Bart gets moved to the genius class. Go ahead and move to the genius class yourself — and earn ten points — by showing that you remember how to spell kwyjibo (pronounced: "KWIH-jee-boh").

Answer: K-W-Y-J-I-B-O

Tossup: 23. Now that he has the financial backing, he plans to put out a new car, currently dubbed the Firestar 500, starting as early as 1998. His new car will be based on the stainless steel-bodied sportster his company marketed in 1981 and 1982, but it will use a substantially more powerful engine which, according to one of it’s backers, "will make it the fastest car in the world." His last run at trying to sell cars was ended by a fifteen-count federal-grand-jury indictment that charged him with racketeering and income tax evasion, among other things. Maybe he shouldn’t have sold cocaine and laundered $17.65 million through his self-named car company. FTP, name this man, whose famous car shouldn’t be taken above eighty-eight miles per hour, unless you want to see some serious shit.

Answer: John Z. DeLorean

Tossup: 24. FAQTP, what do Director Orson Welles, actress Gates McFadden, pitcher Roger Clemens, character actor Emmet Walsh, and rich guy Ross Perot all have in common with Star Trek: The Next Generation character Will Riker’s alter ego Thomas Riker?

Answer: They all go by their middle names

Tossup: 25. It’s a great place to hear Jodie Foster’s voice; Jerry Springer and Alex Trebek — but not Cher — have been there. Peter Boyle, R. Lee Ermey, and Charles Nelson Reilly have all shown up. John Neville and even Richard Belzer make appearances. Nicholas Lea, William B. Davis, and Mitch Pillegi are much more frequent. FTP, what TV show parades around such actors, not to mention Gillian Anderson and David Duchovny?

Answer: The X-Files

Bonuses

Bonus: 1. On Tuesday, March 3rd, four people were elected by the Veterans Committee into the Baseball Hall of Fame — a legendary executive, a Negro League star, a turn-of-the-century great, and the second black man to play in the major leagues in the 20th century. FTP apiece, name any three of the four.

Answer: Lee MacPhail, George Davis, "Bullet" Joe Rogan, Larry Doby

 

Bonus: 2. Ah, the great magazine Rolling Stone, that staple of American culture. FTPE, identify these Rolling Stone alumni.

A) (10) This former Rolling Stone writer has collected some of his articles from Rolling Stone as well as other magazines into a book called The Great Shark Hunt.

Answer: Hunter S. Thompson

B) (10) Now an anchor for MTV News, this former Rolling Stone writer gave — oh my! — Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon a bad review. We don’t wonder why he no longer works for Rolling Stone.

Answer: Kurt Loder

C) (10) Recently he published the short fiction piece "Ambush at Fort Bragg" exclusively in Rolling Stone. This is a far cry from more respectable works such as The Pump-House Gang and The Purple Decade.

Answer: Tom Wolfe

 

Bonus: 3. OK, you know the rules, if you're going to make me write a packet, then you have to deal with the obligatory a cappella question. So, identify the following sometime-to-most-of-the-time a cappella groups from the following clues, FTP apiece. Hint — none of them appear in that damn Chili's commercial.

A) (10) This group was part of the singing chorus of bugs in Joe's Apartment; however, they're more well-known for singing the theme song to the show Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego.

Answer: Rockapella

B) (10) This group has won multiple Grammys, including for its a cappella rendition of A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square. They're more famous for their non-a cappella recordings of Lambert, Hendricks & Ross tunes like Four Brothers, and old stalwarts like Java Jive and the high-school marching band perennial Birdland.

Answer: The Manhattan Transfer

C) (10) This not dead, and thus Canadian quartet has been singing for nearly 25 years, and — other than the annoying occasional karaoke percussion background — never performs with instruments. They're most famous for their 1987 hit recording of Kiss Him Goodbye.

Answer: The Nylons

 

Bonus: 4. It’s common trivia knowledge that the "S" in Harry S Truman’s name simply stands for S. How much do you know about other S. middle names? For the stated number of points, give the following people’s middle names.

A) (5) William S. Burroughs, experimental novelist

Answer: Seward

B) (5) Robert S. McNamara, former U.S. secretary of defense

Answer: Strange

C) (10) Hunter S. Thompson, gonzo journalist

Answer: Stockton

D) (10) Thelonious S. Monk, jazz pianist

Answer: Sphere

 

Bonus: 5. From 1987 to 1989, the Los Angeles Lakers were the only team in NBA history to have four different players who were all the first picks in the draft their respective rookie seasons.

A) (20) First, FFP apiece, name them.

Answer: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar (accept Ferdinand Lewis "Lew" Alcindor, Jr.), Mychal Thompson, Earvin "Magic" Johnson, James Worthy

B) (5) Now, FFP, which one recently sued an NFL player for copyright infringement on his name?

Answer: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar (the NFL player changed his name from Sharmon Shah to Karim Abdul-Jabbar)

C) (5) Finally, FFP, which one adamantly claimed that it was his "first time, really" when he was caught in a prostitution bust?

Answer: James Worthy

Bonus: 6. Muscleman led the Thug Busters and Terri-Bull led The Cosmic Crunchers. That’s right, you remember them, M.U.S.C.L.E. (pronounced "muscle") — those little pink wrestling toys that were even smaller than Smurfs. Stop the reminiscing for a moment and earn yourself five points for each letter that you can expand in the acronym M.U.S.C.L.E.

Answer: Millions of Unusual Small Creatures Lurking Everywhere

 

Bonus: 7. Given the performer, name the hotel/casino at which they can be found nightly in Las Vegas, for the stated number of points.

A) (5) Siegfried & Roy

Answer: The Mirage

B) (10) David Cassidy

Answer: The MGM Grand

C) (15) Lance Burton

Answer: The Monte Carlo

 

Bonus: 8. FTPE, name the following old-school Interplay-brand computer games given their maker’s description.

A) (10) "The city of Skara Brae is threatened by the evil mage Mangar and his minions. Your task is find him and ‘persuade’ him to release the once-harmonious city from his evil grasp."

Answer: The Bard’s Tale

B) (10) "After 90% of the worlds nuclear arsenal went skyward, there are still pockets of civilizations remaining. Your party, the famed Desert Rangers, [has] been assigned to investigate a series of disturbances in the desert."

Answer: Wasteland

C) (10) "A lonely beach. A lifeless hut. And one heck of a headache are presently the sum of your existence. You must now begin a long, dangerous journey to find your identity. And right here is the best place to start."

Answer: Mindshadow

 

Bonus: 9. OK, time to see how well you remember all those random numerical facts that show up on The Simpsons, FTP apiece.

A) (10) In the "Bobo" episode, Mr. Burns is climbing upside down on the kitchen ceiling in the Simpson's home when Homer walks in, goes straight for the refrigerator, and eats a lot of American cheese. How many slices does he eat?

Answer: sixty-four

B) (10) When Bart was trying to escape from some Shelbyville youths, he succeeded by entering a lion's den and exiting through a numbered door. What number was on this door, whose Rocky installment is, according to Bart, subtitled Adrian's Revenge?

A. seven (or "VII")

C) (10) When Bart sued Krusty The Clown after consuming a jagged metal Krusty-O, Lionel Hutz and his crack team of attorneys settled for $100,000.00. After deductions for attorney fees, how much was Bart left with?

A. $500.00

 

Bonus: 10. Character names aren’t always unique to one movie or TV show. We came up with two unrelated movies and one TV show that all have a character with the same name. Given the actor and movie or TV show, give the shared character name they play 30-20-10.

(30) Omar Epps in Juice

(20) Demond Llewelyn in You Only Live Twice

(10) John DeLancie on Star Trek: The Next Generation

Answer: Q

 

Bonus: 11. Given the character, name the actor or actress who portrayed him or her on the TV show Cheers, FFP apiece.

A) (5) Eddie LeBec

Answer: Jay Thomas

B) (5) Harry "The Hat"

Answer: Harry Anderson

C) (5) Evan Drake

Answer: Tom Skeritt

D) (5) Robin Colcord

Answer: Roger Rees

E) (5) Woody's hick cousin from Hanover

Answer: Harry Connick, Jr.

F) (5) Frasier Crane's first wife

Answer: Emma Thompson

 

Bonus: 12. No need for a fancy lead-in here. Five points each: are the following musicians one-hit wonders, Canadian, both, or neither? A one-hit wonder is defined to be someone who has had exactly one single on the Billboard Top 40 pop chart.

A) (5) Big Country

Answer: one-hit wonder (they’re Scottish, hit: In a Big Country)

B) (5) Andy Kim

Answer: Canadian (born Andrew Joachim in Montreal; he had seven Top 40 hits, including Top 10 hits Rock Me Gently and Baby, I Love You)

C) (5) Dexys Midnight Runners

Answer: one-hit wonder (they’re British, hit: Come on Eileen)

D) (5) Crispian St. Peters

Answer: neither (zero Top 40 hits)

E) (5) Tom Cochrane

Answer: both (hit: Life Is a Highway)

F) (5) Gary Wright

Answer: neither (Love is Alive and Dream Weaver were number two hits, Really Wanna Know You reached 16; he is from New Jersey)

 

Bonus: 13. Identify the author from works, 30-20-10.

(30) The Transmigration of Timothy Archer, Humpty Dumpty in Oakland

(20) Martian Time-Slip, Confessions of a Crap Artist

(10) We’ll Remember it for You Wholesale, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?

Answer: Philip K(indred) Dick

 

Bonus: 14. Tony! Toni! Toné! No, not the musical group, but the actor, Tony Danza! Everybody knows that Tony’s dyslexic and that’s why many of his TV characters are named Tony. You’ll earn varying numbers of points for keeping his last names straight. We’ll name the show; you give Tony’s last name.

A) (5) Who’s the Boss?

Answer: Micelli (pronounced: mah-SELL-ee)

B) (5) Taxi

Answer: Banta

C) (10) Hudson Street

Answer: Canetti

D) (10) The Tony Danza Show

Answer: Dimeo

 

Bonus: 15. In Major League Baseball history, only three batters have hit a home run in eight consecutive games. One of them was the first pick in the 1988 amateur draft, another was the American League MVP in 1985, and the third...well, if you don't know who he is in the context of this question, you've probably never heard of him. FTP apiece, name them.

Answer: Ken Griffey, Jr., Don Mattingly, Dale Long

 

Bonus: 16. Come Together by Michael Jackson? AUGGH! How could he steal an Aerosmith song? It’s time for you to save the day — and get points in doing so. Given the song title and an artist who covered it, name the artist who originally recorded it.

(A) (5) You Really Got Me, Van Halen

Answer: The Kinks

(B) (10) Landslide, Smashing Pumpkins

Answer: Fleetwood Mac

(C) (15) Black Magic Woman, popularized by Santana

Answer: Peter Green’s Fleetwood Mac

 

Bonus: 17. OK, it's pointless conjunction time! I give the two clues, and you combine them to form an answer. For example, if I said last year's tournament co-ordinator who got on my case for not turning in a packet, and a song by Shawn Colvin, the answer would be "DAVE LEVINSONNY CAME HOME". Answer the following conjunctions FTP apiece.

A) (10) A Robert Palmer hit and a band from "The Muppet Movie"

Answer: Doctor, Doctor Teeth and the Electric Mayhem

B) (10) A song by Rage Against the Machine, and a movie starring Daniel Day-Lewis.

Answer: Killing in the Name of the Father

C) (10) Major League Baseball's third all-time leader in hits, and the perpetual love interest of the title character of a comic by Greg Evans.

Answer: Hank Aaron Hill (accept Henry Aaron Hill)

 

Bonus: 18. Time to trash overused quizbowl questions. Given the amazingly short clue in "blah blah" form, give the typical quizbowl answer F5PE. Of course, it would be too easy if you didn’t have to give their first and last name. For example, if I said "blah blah bongo-playing physicist," you’d get five points for saying "Richard Feynman." Also, you’d look even cooler if you said "Richard Phillips Feynman."

A) (5) Blah blah Sri-Lankan author

Answer: Arthur C(harles) Clarke

B) (5) Blah blah Norwegian mathematician

Answer: Niels Henrik Abel

C) (5) Blah blah MIT linguist

Answer: (Avram) Noam Chomsky (accept Avram Chomsky)

D) (5) Blah blah Jewish lensgrinder

Answer: Baruch Spinoza

E) (5) Blah blah winner of two unshared Nobel prizes

Answer: Linus (Carl) Pauling

F) (5) Warning! Two answers required! Blah blah British Prime Ministers

Answer: William Ewart Gladstone and Benjamin "Dizzy" Disraeli, 1st Earl of Beaconsfield

 

Bonus: 19. In recent a informal survey in Moscow by Pravda, one man remarked: "I was always biased against your country...but now I see you're a real man. Carry on! Russia supports you!"

A) (10) FTP, to whom was he referring?

Answer: William "Bill" (Jefferson) Clinton

B) (10) FTP, when President Bill once joked upon seeing a curvy, 500-year-old mummy that he wanted to "date" it, what press secretary allegedly later remarked: "Compared to that mummy he's been fucking, why not?"

Answer: Mike McCurry

C) (10) Allegedly according to Katherine Willey (an appropriate name), what is Clinton's unique physical characteristic that was observed by both her and Paula Jones?

Answer: His face turns beet red (accept equivalent)

 

Bonus: 20. Aye-aye, captain! Even those of us stricken with eye maladies can become famous — witness the three answers to this bonus. FTPE, given a description of the person and their optical problem, name them.

(A) (10) The lead singer from Men at Work who had a lazy eye.

Answer: Colin Hay

(B) (10) Valerie Harper’s glass-eyed replacement who turned Valerie’s Family into The Hogan Family.

Answer: Sandy Duncan

(C) (10) He played the bumbling Columbo and his eyes, to use a technical term, went all over the place sometimes.

Answer: Peter Falk

 

Bonus: 21. Name the author from works, 30-20-10.

(30) Rememberance of Swings Past

(20) Baseball Lite, Strike Two

(10) The Umpire Strikes Back, The Fall of the Roman Umpire

Answer: Ron Luciano

 

Bonus: 22. Ever complain that a tournament didn’t have enough Simpsons questions? Well, here are some pretty simple ones to sate your thirst. Answer the following questions for the stated number of points.

A) (5) Who shot Mr. Burns?

Answer: Maggie Simpson

B) (10) What’s Krusty the Klown’s real name?

Answer: Herschel Krustofsky

C) (15) What is Apu’s last name? Please, for the love of Vishnu, answer slowly.

Answer: Nahasapeemapetilon

 

Bonus: 23. Remember the good 'ole days back when us intellectual nerds could attract a crowd in an arcade because of our prowess at the one video game that presumably required some mild amount of intelligence? Yes, that's right, time for some Tetris crap, FTP apiece.

A) (10) In the traditional version of the game, how many different pieces are there (mirrored pieces are counted as different)?

Answer: seven

B) (10) In the original ugly red PC version, what was the maximum possible score?

Answer: 65,535 (accept 216-1)

C) (10) In the original Nintendo version, what music blared during play if you left all the settings on default?

Answer: The Nutracker Suite

 

Bonus: 24.This question belongs in a real packet, but we’ll throw it in because every good trash packet deserves a serious question or two. FFPE, given the nickname of the jazz great, give their real name.

A) Count Basie

Answer: William Allen Basie

B) Duke Ellington

Answer: Edward Kennedy Ellington

C) The Prez

Answer: Lester Young

D) Lady Day

Answer: Billie Holliday

E) Bird

Answer: Charlie Parker

F) Kenny G

Answer: Kenny Gorelick

 

Bonus: 25. Name the mathematician 30-20-10.

(30) He is currently the Eugene Higgins Professor of Mathematics at Princeton.

(20) He proved the Shimura-Taniyama conjecture in 1995; the result was published in The Annals of Mathematics May 1995 issue, which I’m sure you all have on your coffee table.

(10) Did we mention that proving the Shimura-Taniyama conjecture also proves Fermat’s last theorem?

Answer: Andrew (John) Wiles